Carrot cupcakes with lemon cream cheese frosting

I've never liked cake much, other than chocolate cake (I know, I'm weird). But for some reason, I've always liked carrot cake, even as a kid. I realize now that my love affair with carrot cake can be attributed to the cream cheese frosting (further emphasizing my undying obsession with cheese and cheese-based desserts).

Image 1. Dat sprinkle of cinnamon

Let me guess what you're thinking. Carrot cake? Really? Carrot cake has been around for eons and there are countless tried and true recipes all over the internet. But mine is a little bit different. Being the problem solver that I am, I have identified three major issues with carrot cake as we know it today.

1. It's too carrot-y. I know, I know, what an absurd problem to have with a dessert called carrot cake. But there is something to be said about carrot cake with just a hint of carrot and no more than that.
2. It's not spicy enough. When I want to taste cinnamon, I WANT TO TASTE CINNAMON, as well as a blend of other sensual autumnal spices. Go big or go home.
3. IT HAS EVIL, DISGUSTING NUTS IN IT.

I really hate nuts in desserts, without exception. I like nuts just fine on their own, and I am completely infatuated with peanut butter to the point where I will eat it from the jar with a spoon like it's ice cream. But in cakes, brownies, and cookies, I think they are the spawn of Satan. THEY JUST DON'T BELONG.

Oh let me just eat this brownie. Mmm, so chocolatey, so delici - wait, what's this crunchy thing? A FREAKIN' WALNUT CHUNK. GO TO HELL, WALNUT.

Of course, you can always omit them from the recipe, but I hate nuts in desserts so much that it bothered me too much to even see it in any recipe, that it even be suggested to me that I add NUTS IN MY DAMN CAKES. HOW DARE YOU. Naturally, I had to come up with my own recipe.

(makes 12 cupcakes)

• 2 eggs
• 1/2 c vegetable or canola oil
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
• 1/2 c granulated sugar
• 1/2 c dark brown sugar (don't pack it in)
• 1 c unbleached all-purpose flour
• 1 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 tsp ground cinnamon
• 1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
• 1/2 tsp lemon peel
• 1/4 tsp ground cloves
• 1/4 tsp ground ginger
• 3/4 c grated carrots
• 2 tbsp lemon juice

First thing's first, peel and grate some carrots. I peeled about 3 particularly skinny ones, chopped them up into little disks, and threw them in the blender. Just 3/4 of a cup is all you need.

Image 2. Grated carrots

Now crack the two eggs and mix in a bowl with oil, vanilla, and the sugars. Once that's thoroughly mixed, add the flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt all at once. Fold the batter with a rubber spatula.

Then get your autumn spices ready.

Image 3. The smell of autumn

I know it's the farthest thing from fall right now, but I believe things that are traditionally "fall" should be eaten literally all of the time for the rest of forever. This whole thing with pumpkin flavored beverages/desserts/breakfast items being only available in the fall is total BS if you ask me. Keep it year round.

Of course, if you have a container of "pumpkin pie spice" you can just use about 2 teaspoons of that, but I don't like to buy spices that are actually a multitude of spices mixed together (e.g. seasoning salt, pumpkin pie spice, curry powder, garam masala). I also added lemon peel because I'm obsessed with lemon.

Add the spices to the cake batter and bask in the aroma before tossing in the carrots. The batter might be a little thick, so add some lemon juice until viscous and lava-like. 

Spoon into greased or lined cupcake tray, and bake at 350F for 15 minutes, or until a sharp object of your choice in the center comes out clean.

Image 4. Ready for the oven's hot, steamy loins

While the cupcakes are baking, make this scrumptiously tart lemon cream cheese frosting.

• 8 oz neufchatel cheese (aka light cream cheese)
• 1/4 c unsalted butter
• 1/2 tsp lemon peel
• 1 cup powdered sugar
• 1 tsp lemon juice

Pretty straightforward stuff: just blend all the ingredients together. Without the lemon juice, I found that the frosting was clumping up, so I added it as an afterthought.

A quick warning, though; this frosting is tart, cheesy, and not very sweet. I don't like sweet frosting because I am a strange child, but if you do, you can add more sugar and/or butter until it is to your liking.

Now take those cupcakes out of the oven. Once again, bask in the aroma of autumn, friends. The best (and most ephemeral) season of all.

Image 5. The morning after a fiery one night stand with the oven

Now pipe some cream cheese frosting on top, and sprinkle with more cinnamon for garnish.

Image 6. Please don't make fun of my weird piping. I don't have a piping bag.

Well, there you have it, folks. Carrot cupcake specifically catered to Jung Ha's taste buds (i.e. obviously the only kind of taste buds that matter in the world that I'm living in). Even if you aren't a huge fan of carrot, I don't think you will regret trying this. And if you don't like cream cheese, stay away. Also, what's wrong with you? Cream cheese is godly. The nectar of the gods, if you will.

Have fun with this recipe! Consider it an opportunity to increase your vegetable intake (as well as your butter and sugar intake, but we don't speak of those things). :)